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Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind... Romans 12:2

Desultory Thoughts on Masculinity

by Garry Vanderveen

Christian masculinity takes various forms. On the one extreme we have macho men. These men like to hang out with the boys. They call it "male bonding." They drink beer, eat chips, burp loudly, and generate noisome gases. It's not that these men don't behave rudely in front of women and children; it's just that they feel less inhibited in front of the brotherhood. These men tend to treat women poorly; they are chauvinists.

On the other side of the spectrum, we have touchy-feely men. They attend huge gatherings in footfall stadiums where they hear retired professional athletes "share" their testimonies and encourage each other to be accountable. These men are not afraid to get in touch with their deepest feelings. They hold hands, cry, hug, and are not afraid to say, "I love you Bob."

The sad fact is that many men today refuse to define masculinity in light of the Bible. Biblical men know that there is a time to fight and a time to put the sword away. David was a man of war; Solomon, a man of peace. At times, they may use strong language. Paul sarcastically pokes fun of the Judaizers: he wishes that they would over-achieve and lop the whole thing off. Real men are willing to stand for truth, even when it may be uncomfortable: Paul confronted Peter to his face when Peter was being a hypocrite (Gal. 2:11ff.).

Recently, one of my deacons drove to a football game with four other men. "Real" men. "Masculine" men. My deacon, who is always eager to generate discussion that might lead to an evangelistic encounter, posed a question: "Do you know what the leading cause of death is in Canada?" "No," they replied. "Abortion," said he. Pregnant silence filled the car for several minutes. Now remember, only macho men were in the car. Surely they would be willing to engage him. But not a peep. Until finally someone had the nerve to ask a football question. Now to be fair, these men were unbelievers. They were uncomfortable. But they were wimps.

Real men, masculine men, biblical men, are willing to engage in discussion, especially when that discussion centres on the Word.

As a pastor I find it particularly distressing when men who claim to uphold sola Scriptura consistently fail to discuss applications of the Bible. The evangelical mantra is, "The Bible alone." The Bible alone is our only infallible and inerrant guide. Wherever the Bible goes, we will follow. Whatever it teaches, we will believe. Whatever it demands, we will do.

But the sad fact is that sola Scriptura has become a dead phrase. God appointed Jeremiah to preach against Jerusalem. The people of Judah believed that God would save them simply because they had access to the Temple. They too had a mantra: "The temple of the Lord, the temple of the Lord, the temple of the Lord." But God condemned them. He didn't want their vain and trite phrases. He wanted them to live in covenant faithfulness. Obedience is better than words. It is far more honest to deny sola Scriptura and live accordingly than to uphold it in principle and never live it.

Perhaps the lack of biblical masculinity is nowhere more obvious than in men's inability to deal with sin. On this, Jesus is very clear. In Matthew 18 he says that if a brother sins against you, confront him to his face. Paul writes essentially the same thing. "Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted" (Galatians 6:1). "You who are Spiritual" simply means baptized believers—we receive the Spirit at baptism (1 Cor. 12:13). Thus, Paul's point is that everyone in the church has a duty and responsibility to deal with sinning brothers. And if Christian men have a duty to confront sin in the lives of their brothers, they also have a duty to receive a rebuke. However, it is precisely at this point that modern men fail.

Some men simply refuse to deal with sin in their own lives. Their posture is that you can't teach an old dog new tricks. They have become complacent. And when you confront them with gross sin in their lives, eg. "Why do you allow your son to sleep with his girlfriend?" they yell and scream. Real men—Christian men—don't yell and scream. They receive the rebuke for what it is. They appreciate the concern.

Some men simply refuse to deal with sin in the lives of their brothers. Time and time again men come to me with "dirt" on Brother X. They are afraid that Brother X won't be able to handle the truth, "I don't think that he will respond very well." This is an unmanly. The Bible doesn't tell us to confront only those men who will receive the truth; it is a pious way to cover our own sin. "Go tell him his fault," Jesus says.

Instead of dealing with sin, many Christian men find verses to defend their pusillanimity. Demonic interpretation appeals to Scripture verses and wrestles them from their context. Demonic interpretation uses Scripture to serve our own purposes. Satan quoted Scripture to Jesus, but he abused the Word. We do the same thing today. Peter, quoting Solomon, writes that love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). We now "know" that Peter meant that love sweeps sin under the carpet. Love turns its head and pretends sin doesn't exist. When a brother apostatises from the faith, we refuse to tell him that he is on the road to hell. We refuse to excommunicate him and cut him off from the fellowship of the saints. Instead, we hold his hand, hug him, and tell him how much we love him. And we make sure that we shed a few crocodile tears as we speak to him. It is scandalous.

The church today is full of wimpy men who refuse to take a stand for anything. They won't discuss the Bible. They don't confront sin. They won't receive a rebuke. Is it any wonder that the church is in such a mess?

Return to Volume 9, Number 2.